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The past two days I have been able to feel like we’re making some serious progress on issues unresolved.  Yesterday, our ECI caseworker had arranged for me to meet with their staff nutritionist.   She came to the house, weighed & measured Will (he’s holding steady at 22 pounds, 8 ounces, and 34 3/4 inches).  He’s still not on the American or Chinese growth charts and gaining weight sooooo slowly.  I have serious concerns about him being considered failure to thrive if he doesn’t pick up some weight soon.  The nutritionist was able to give me some great tips about how to add good fat and calories to Will’s diet.  She was also able to draw on her experience with other Asian clients to recommend some foods that Will might prefer and that won’t be too difficult for me to prepare.  It was a good meeting — and although it was only supposed to last 10 minutes, we somehow stretched it to 75 minutes as she asked tons of questions about Will’s eating habits, my cooking abilities, and our family’s preferences.  What a productive meeting.  I’ll probably head off to Sprouts or the Health Market on Friday to pick up many of the things on the long list she left for me.

Today was a relief, too.  I gathered up all of our documents from China and since, to go to the Social Security office and apply for Will’s SS number & card.  Last year, when I went to replace Margaret’s and my lost cards, we were there about 2 hours.  I was sooooo dreading the trip, as 2 hours in a government office with Will seemed like a less-than-fun way to spend our day.  However, I must have picked a good day to go, because we were literally in and out in 40 minutes!  They checked Will’s Chinese passport, his Certificate of Citizenship, our Adoption Decree, and my driver’s license.  That’s it!  But trust me, I had a whole bag full of both Chinese and American documents with seals, stamps, notarization, and certification, just ready to go.  Will was awesome, and made lots of friends with the grannies and granddads who were waiting with us.  All in all, it was a “1 bag of Skittles” adventure.  Thank goodness we finished up just as the Skittles ran out!

In other important news, it was Karate Cat’s birthday.  Margaret made a cake in her Easy Bake Oven, and we had a big party on the kitchen table for all the Webkinz.  I wonder what Will is going to think when  it’s his turn to blow out the candles and celebrate his birthday, exactly one week from today!

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Seriously, this weekend felt like one step forward and five steps back.  I think I’ve mentioned before that as soon as we have a really good day, it is followed by a really, really bad one.  I need to remember that it is totally normal for this settling in period to last around a year — one book I read mentioned it will take 1 month of adjustment at home for every 3 months the child spent in the orphanage.  No kidding, Will had a truly HARD time this weekend.  He spent most of the day Saturday screaming, in the baby carrier, or getting his way so we didn’t have to endure another tantrum.  Sunday wasn’t much better, except that the day turned around when Brad and I took the kids to the park to enjoy the sunshine & clear sky.  The kids had a great time, and got just dirty enough  

Here they are on the Merry Go Round, or “Spinner Thing”, as Margaret calls it:

Family Picture, how fun using the timer feature on the camera — Jack was making a grouchy face on purpose, by the way :

Other fun shots – Daddy’s boy, and Jack playing “American Gladiators” with his poor, reluctant sister:

We did have some great times with Brad’s dad, who came down for a short visit.   Here are Pop Pop & Will meeting for the first time.  After about 6 hours, Will actually let Pop Pop pick him up, just for a moment.  Mike was so patient and let Will come to him in his own time.  The two got along very well, especially when the big kids got home from school & Will was able to follow their lead & play and wrestle with Pop a bit.  Friday night, Brad took his dad & the big kids to a hockey game.  Jack had a great time – he’s such a sports fan.  Margaret was pretty bored, but had fun chowing down on everything her daddy could find for her to eat and dragging him to the bathroom again and again and again.  Saturday, we stayed in most of the day, played around the house & went for a walk.  Jack had a soccer game late in the afternoon.  Yes, of course he scored a goal when I got up to take Margaret & Will to the potty!  Then we went to Brad’s sisters for a family dinner & to drop off Pop Pop for their “turn” to visit with him.

I just realized that this post is chronologically a mess.  Where did that English teacher in me go?

Yikes!

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Today was such a great day I had to write about it.  Will woke up so peacefully this morning and snuggled tightly into my shoulder as we got the big kids ready for school.  A lot of mornings he is tantruming by 7:30 or I have to wrestle him into his carseat, but this morning he was all smiles and playing his little game where he hides his shoe from me & we have to look in our mouths, ears, noses, under our shirts, and so on to find the missing shoe(which is always behind his back).  We took the kids to school then came home for a bottle.  I forgot we had therapy this morning, but Jessi knocked on the door around 8:15, and Will was so happy to see her.  He was making silly faces and showing off the whole time she was here.  We were both laughing at him, wondering where this happy, carefree child came from. 

After that, Will decided to get dressed without fussing a bit.  Again, I didn’t have to wrestle him into his pants, but he gladly slipped them on & even helped me with his shirt.  We headed to WalMart for groceries, where he rode peacefully in the cart the whole time.  He munched on tortillas & fruit snacks , helped me pick out the cereal, & even told me when he had to use the potty.  I stopped and got him some chicken nuggets for a treat on the way home.  He had me cracking up when he spilled his water all over, so had to strip – all the way – and then just wanted to run around the house (and front yard) naked.  Ok, he still had his diaper on when he escaped to the front yard, but not by choice. 

He fell asleep easily for his nap, woke up with a smile, and was cheerful when we went to pick up the big kids from school.  Suddenly a commedian, he was waving his arms in the air, screaming, then laughing at himself.  Afternoon is usually his hard time, but Will was still peaceful & sweet while Jack and Margaret did homework and we all had snacks.  I wore him in the backpack to make dinner, and he stayed fairly content.  He used his signs to tell me he was thirsty, that he got hurt, and that his diaper was wet.  How awesome that he is communicating so well & finally able to tell me what he needs!  Poor guy got his fingers slammed in a door, but he allowed me to console him, which is a treat.

We did have one short meltdown at bedtime.  I left the room for just a moment & of course he followed me out.   When I used my big dinosaur voice to remind him to get back in bed, he melted into big tears, kicking, screaming, and throwing his blankie across the room.  Brad and I agreed he probably just needed a release before he could fall asleep – the whole thing lasted fewer than 15 minutes. 

It was such a great day, it made me think maybe we are finally turning a corner with Will.  It was just a normal day, nothing important or exciting happening, but we had such peace & really enjoyed each other.  What a blessing to just enjoy my baby’s sweet smile & and melt in his chocolate eyes.  I need more days like that. 

Here he is practicing his feelings faces.  I can’t remember exactly which face is which emotion, but they’re still all cute )

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We confirmed with the surgeon this week, and Will’s surgery is scheduled for Monday, March 31.  It’s almost exactly 6 weeks away, but with both boys’ birthdays, spring break, and family coming in town, the time is going to fly by.  We have several appointments with various dr’s in the meantime, including well checks, bloodwork, and a full eval from the ENT before then, too. 

We have 2 weeks left of speech/developmental therapy with ECI before Will turns 3 and becomes ineligible.  The therapists are going to give us some things to work on over the summer, as we have decided not to start him in speech through the school district until next fall.  We might do private speech therapy, but I do think Will needs time just to heal & get used to having a roof in his mouth first. 

Right now, please just pray for Will to be healthy.  He goes from ear infection to sinus infection to cough to ??? every few weeks.  I really don’t think he’s been healthy much of the time he’s been with us at all.  Unfortunately, he’s probably used to feeling crummy all of the time, as this is often the case with cleft kids.

We finally found the cable that connects the video camera to the tv, so we were able to watch Will’s “Gotcha Day” video as a family this weekend.  Amazing, I had already forgotten so many details of the day.  I surprised myself when I audibly gasped as we watched Will and his nanny walk through the curtain and toward us in the video.  Will  was also transfixed.  It’s hard to express how much I wish I knew what he was thinking and feeling.  As challenging it is for me to care for his needs sometimes, I can’t even imagine how overwhelming the past 2 1/2 months have been for him. 

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It was a happy first Valentine’s Day for our sweet Will, and a very happy day for the rest of us, too.  Since we started the day in tantrum mode, I was able to get Will down a bit early for his nap.  Just this once, kicking and screaming before breakfast turned out to be a good thing   He was awake in time to accompany me to Jack’s and Margaret’s class Valentine’s parties. 

Oh, and is he a celebrity among Jack’s classmates, or what?  The moment we walked in the door, all heads turned & every eye was on Jack’s little buddy.  I really did see a whole new side of Jack, as he played the big brother role like never before.  He let Will sit in his chair and go through his desk.  He played a silly game (pictured above, right) where Will pretended to take Jack’s nose & eat it.  Even the moms were interested – and we all laughed our heads off when Will spanked another mom’s tush when she was teasing & got him just a little bit too wound up.  Oh my!  It was truly hard to leave, since we were having such a good time.

But we were off to Margaret’s party down in the kindergarten pod.  Margaret was equally happy to see her little brother, and her teacher invited her to stand up and introduce her new brother to the whole class.  Will was mostly interested in trying to play in the little classroom sink, though, and attempting to steal treats & goodies off the kids’ desks.  Funny, but kindergartners do not think a rambunctious 2-year-old is as cute as 2nd graders do.  Big sister was proud, nonetheless, especially when the teacher invited her to sit at the teacher desk with her brother and show him some math manipulatives. 

Later, at home, the kids big kids were thrilled by some new Webkinz for Valentine’s day, and Will loved his new teddy bear (that he had actually picked out himself at the store).  The kids gave me the best gift ever when they all got along and almost didn’t fight at all when we went out front to play.  They hooked the wagon up behind the power wheels motorcycle and gave each other rides around the cul de sac.  Of all things, they ended up playing that Jack was the pilot, Margaret was flight attendant, and Will was passenger on a flight to Thailand (?).  Margaret even ran in the house & poured/spilled drinks to serve everyone.   Daddy brought some chocolate home from after work, which made everyone happy, and then we ended the day with heart-shaped pizzas from Papa Johns. 

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