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This morning we got up early to leave by 8am for our visit to Dongguan City Children’s Welfare Institute.  We definitely knew we wanted to visit the orphanage, so the 90 minute drive    was a small price to pay for this priceless glimpse into our child’s past.  The Ausdenmoore’s also were visiting their child’s orphanage, but facing a 4 hour drive each way.  Since Bob also had to pick up the babies’ passports and pick up another family at the airport, he hired another guide/translator to go with them.  He came along with us, knowing that we could be back in time for lunch — I asked him how many times he’s been to Dongguan, by the way.  He said this is his 7th time.  Brad and I joked that we really didn’t need to ask the nannies any questions, Bob could just answer for us.  And honestly, many times he doesn’t even bother translating our questions to the staff but just answers us himself.

When we arrived, we were very warmly greeted by a lady who is in charge of preparing the childrens’ files for adoption.  An office worker also helped escort us through the facility.  Both women were very friendly and seemed happy for Will Zhiguo.  They talked to him in Cantonese and were very hands-on, which he did NOT like.  Every time someone from the orphanage tried to touch him, Will Zhiguo would push their hand away and lean into me.  He didn’t seem agitated or upset about being there, but he definitely did not want me to let go of him!  They really didn’t let us see very much at all, and we were instructed to not take pictures of any of the children.  As we walked through the hall, Bob pointed out the bookroom for the older children and I noticed a music/dance room.  There were also several washrooms and baby rooms of various sizes.  In all, we probably saw fewer than 30 children at the orphanage, all with special needs, most with cleft lip/palate.  But again, we were only shown 1 floor of the institution, and not all of the doors were open to us.  

At one point, we did see Will Zhiguo’s primary caregiver.  She smiled very big when she saw it was us, but she was busy in the physical therapy room with several older babies/toddlers.  I wish we could have spent a few minutes with her, but as Brad says, she has already said her goodbyes.  We also got to meet Will Zhiguo’s best friend.  He has the crib right next to Will Zhiguo’s.  Brad and I touched him and talked to him and went around the room to caress as many little faces as we could.  Looking into so many sets of beautiful brown eyes, we were overwhelmed that our own son had spent so many months just laying in his crib, waiting for us to come get him.  We also met a little cutie whose parents are going to pick her up on Monday.  I tried hard to remember her name to post on the Dongguan families board, and let her family know she is looks great & is ready for them, but it escapes me now.  We asked to take a picture of Will Zhiguo’s crib (the one on the left) and the nannies quickly moved all the babies from the surrounding beds so we would not photograph them.  Of course Will did not want to go into his old crib!  He held on tight when the workers motioned that he might want to visit for old time’s sake!

Last thing, we visited the orphanage playground.  We could tell Will Zhiguo has been there before, as he made a bee line for the slide!  One of the workers had given him a sucker, and  he was making me nervous running with it, not to mention making a sticky mess of anything within 10 feet.  I took the sucker from him & he about had a total meltdown.  We knew it was time to go, even though we’d only been there for about 40 minutes.  I felt emotional & let down, but knew that there was no sense in drawing this out.   We headed out through the front doors & were going to have some photos with the Dongguan workers, but Will Zhiguo kept getting upset when they came near him to pose.  He was getting frustrated and upset, so I could really tell it was time to go.  We let him throw his little cup around the courtyard a bit and everyone laughed as he ran after it & teased the adults.  He really can play this game forever   As we headed toward the van, we asked Bob to tell the workers how much we appreciate their hard work in ensuring that these children get as much love & attention as possible.  I asked him to tell them that he is eating, sleeping, playing, going to the potty well and Brad wanted them to know that we will do everything in our power to love and protect Will Zhiguo as if he were our biological child.  The one worker gave me a long hug and walked me to the van with her arm around my shoulders.  It was hard for me not to cry as we said goodbye forever to this important part of our child’s life.  She hugged me at least twice more and said “thank you” in English.  Both

workers took  the time to speak to Will Zhiguo and give him as much of a hug as he would let them. 

We had a long drive back to Guangzhou, but it passed fairly quickly.  Brad asked  Bob to take us to the computer market on the way back to the island.  Again, total craziness in 100 market stalls, but Brad really enjoyed looking around at everything and trying to figure out prices compared with the US.

This afternoon, it’s nap time and then a trip to the playground when the little guy wakes up.  Tomorrow we get to meet the other Heritage family that will be with us for the rest of the trip, then we’re going to do some on-foot exploration of Guangzhou off the island.  Oh, and Bob has started to call Brad “Mr. McDonald’s” because that’s all Brad ever asks to eat.  He’ll probably lose at least 5 pounds before we get home next Wednesday.  I’ll probably gain just as much because I absolutely love the local food.  Guess Will and I will have to go out to Chinese for lunch when Brad’s at work & the kids are at school.  It’ll be our special thing.

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It’s hard to believe we’ve been gone so long.  This trip is flying by, and we are already counting down the days until we make the long flight home.  At the same time, though, it’s unthinkable that I have only been Will Zhiguo’s mom for 4 days!  He is so much a part of me already.  Yesterday I had him in the front carrier as he napped.  When he woke up, he looked up at me with the widest eyes I have seen then broke into a smile that said – Oh, thank goodness, it wasn’t a dream!  We are feeling that very same thing as we watch this child change and grow with lightning speed.

Yesterday (day 9) was a crazy day.  We had an easy morning, then met Bob and the Ausdenmoores in the lobby at 10:30.  First we were off to have Will Zhiguo & Braelyn Huaxiong’s visa and passport photos taken.  Next, we walked down the street to the medical examination office.  The babies had their adoption physicals done and we were through in about 20 minutes.  After that short outing, we came back to our room, where we all sat down together and Bob talked us through every line of the remaining paperwork.  (Where was he for the 6 months I was filling out dossier paperwork?  I could have used and expert to tell me what to write on every line!)  Then a quick break.  Brad gave Will Zhiguo his bottle & I laid down with him to try to get him to fall asleep.  No luck, though, and we only had about 30 minutes before we were off for an afternoon of shopping. 

Shopping consisted in a few hours’ trip to the toy market & then the electronics market.  Wow, what an experience!  The market is housed in a 5 story building filled with hundreds of small, individual stalls — sort of like an indoor flea market.  Many of the stalls sell the same thing over & over, but we did find some interesting things to buy in each place.  In general, the aisles are crammed, people are smoking all over the place, it’s noisy & dirty.  For a girl who doesn’t really like to shop in the first place, it’s a bit overwhelming.  Then, the moment that Brad had been waiting for – lunch at McDonald’s!  Yes, this new son of ours loves McDonald’s fries and  tolerated the chicken nuggets when they were dipped in sweet & sour sauce.  Jack, Margaret, the baby and I got Happy Meals and saved the toys to bring home to you.  They are pretty cool Olympics themed  toys.  I felt pretty safe in thinking that McDonald’s would have western style potties, but no such luck.  Every time I have to brave a “squatty potty”, I take a deep breath for courage and try to act like I’ve been doing this my whole life.  So far, though, no accidents.  I can’t help but wonder if it’s really that much cheaper to install these fixtures, or is it just that all of the developers here are men, and think nothing of how much effort it takes us girls to use one of these things.  Anyway, by  the time I got back from the restroom, Will Zhiguo was screaming his head off.  As frustrating as it is for Brad – and everyone else who is trying to eat their lunch in peace – it’s a good sign that little mister gets upset when I leave.  It means he is quickly forming attachments and does care who is looking after him.  If you think about the number of nannies, cooks, medical staff, etc. that look after children in the orphanage, it’s easy to understand how institutionalized children will just let anyone feed them or wipe their chin.  Will Zhiguo definitely knows that he has a mommy and a daddy now and prefers us over strangers or even the other adults in our travel group.

After our busy day, we were all pretty wiped out.  We came back to the room and rested a bit.  I introduced Will Zhiguo to some playdoh, which we had brought along in our suitcase.  After realizing that it was not something good to eat, he was busy for at least an hour squishing balls that I made for him, tearing little chunks out of the can with his fork, or stuffing bits of playdoh into an empty water bottle & shaking it.  We had some soup and leftover pizza in our room and went to bed at the same time as the baby – around 8:30.  We are all so exhausted!

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Hooray!  According to the Chinese law, Zhiguo is officially our son!  We went back to the Civil Affairs office yesterday and signed the papers with a notary.  We also were photographed as a family and had our adoption certificate made. I know that Zhiguo has no idea that we are now a forever family, but I think he does feel safe and loved.  That’s all that matters right now.  After our appointment, Bob took us to Carrefour, which is a French-owned Wal-mart type store.  We bought diapers and formula to donate to the orphanage when we visit Friday.  We also bought some bottles that are more like the one he brought with him from the orphanage and some diapers and dish soap.  The babies were so tired after that, so we came back to the hotel then for a short naptime.  At 3:00 we went back out to the police station to apply for Zhiguo’s passport & have his photo taken.  Last night we had a quiet dinner at Lucy’s, just the 3 of us and about 50 other adoptive families and stopped by the photo shop to drop off the disposable camera we mailed to the orphanage a few months ago.  Zhiguo cried hard for the first time last night, but he was consolable, thank goodness.  He has not started to greive yet, so we’re still waiting for that to hit.  He did cry in his bed during the night & again when he woke up, but he allowed me to comfort him each time.  He definitely recognizes me as his primary caregiver & will come to me for comfort or safety.  Brad is the food guy — he carries the snacks & makes all the bottles, so that is really helping them bond, as well.  As with most orphans, food is a HUGE deal to Zhiguo.  He has a cracker or something in his hand almost all the time. 

Today was a free day for us.  Whew!  I think we all need it!  We are just staying close to the hotel, playing in our room & at the little park that is about a block away.  As you can see from the video, Zhiguo loved the slide. At first he was very cautious & just wanted to walk around holding my hand.  Then I just picked him up & stuck him at the top of the slide.  I held his hand the first few times, then he was off like a rocket.  We got dizzy watching him go around and  around, up and down the slide!  He is very physical when he plays, so we can see why he came to us with scratches all over his face.  He knocks his head on just about everything that is in a 10 foot range and has already earned himself a pretty nice bruise on his chin.  The Chinese grannies were talking to me at the park and asking about his forehead — what could I do but smile & nod?  They were also talking to him a lot, which made me nervous.  But Brad says they seemed to be encouraging him and were being sweet.  I’m just a freak about strangers talking to my kids, so it made me uneasy, especially since I couldn’t tell what they were saying. 

We checked with Bob yestarday — he’s a great guide & translator, by the way.  We wanted to make sure Will doesn’t mean anything bad in Mandarin before we start using the baby’s American name.  He says that Will is fine & has no meaning in Chinese.  Watch out, though,if your child is named Ben.  I guess Ben means “stupid” in Mandarin — oops!  So now, we are starting to call the baby Will Zhiguo when we think of it.  We’ll probably call him Will Zhiguo for at least a few days or maybe even after we come home.  It’s really up to how well he is responding.  Honestly, like any 2-year-old, he only responds about 1/2 of the time when we call him Zhiguo.  Sometimes he will smile, though when I say “Zhiguo, wo aye ni” , or “I love you”.

Things are going really well, and as Brad says, “We couldn’t have scripted it any better.”  It’s just proof to us that God has ordained this from the beginning of time.  We see His hands on  us, on Zhiguo, and also on Jack and Margaret as they struggle this difficult time at home with Grandma.  God is in control, and we feel it in every breath of this trip.

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I hope you enjoy this as much as we did. 

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If there is such a thing as a perfect “gotcha day”, it was our day yesterday.  We met in the hotel lobby at 2pm with the Ausdenmoores & our guide, Bob.  It is a short, 15 minute drive to the Civil Affairs office.  When we arrived, we were fortunate to meet the Dongguan Orphanage director in the lobby.  After we rode up in the elevator, he went left into the room where the babies were waiting and we were directed to a waiting area to the right.  It was clear that the babies were just in the next room, so we didn’t even sit down.  We gave Bob the necessary documents, and within seconds HuaXiong was brought out to Aus & Marie.  We waited anxiously as the workers called out Zhiguo’s name and we could see him coming toward us.  He was walking on his own, holding a toy fire truck in one hand and his nanny’s hand in the other.  Brad and I were so excited, but neither of us cried because we didn’t want to frighten Zhiguo. 

At first, Zhiguo was reluctant to come me.  Brad was videoing & taking pictures, so Bob motioned for me to go ahead and pick the baby up.  I crouched down & sat him on my knee.  Immediately, he leaned back into my chest.  We just enjoyed the moment for a while and checked him out from head to to.  I just remember his coarse black hair on my face as I kissed him on the head.  We moved over to the seating area and the someone suggested some candy for Zhiguo.  Brad found a lollipop, which Zhiguo gladly accepted.  The nanny sat across from us and just watched us get to know our new son.  I can’t even imagine her emotions in that moment.  We learned later that she was his primary caregiver, and that Zhiguo actually lived with her in an apartment behind the orphanage.  During the day, he came to work with her, and at night they would go home together.  I think since he was about 1 year old.  Thankfully, Brad videoed the entire question & answer session so we can go back and review the details.  Brad filled out more paperwork while I played with the baby.   He laughed out loud for the first time as we played with the panda puppet from the care package we sent him.  He would punch the panda in the nose & I would make a little noise and make the panda fall off.  He thought that was the best!

  When is was time to go, the nanny made it a point to say goodbye.  Bob told Zhiguo clearly that she was leaving.  Zhiguo looked up and waved to her but was content to stay with us.  A few moments later, we left.  Zhiguo rode in the van on my lap — what a weird thing for me, the car seat queen!  Back at the hotel, Bob came up to our room and explained the toilet to Zhiguo.  Bob also taught me to say “ny ny” to let Zhiguo know it’s time to potty.  He will also point to his bottom if he needs to go.  Then, off to the grocery store.  We needed to buy some toddler formula, as Zhiguo still takes 3 bottles of formula a day.  This is probably pretty good, considering how tiny he is.

We stayed in our room the rest of the evening.  Brad and I ordered Papa Johns & got some fried rice from Zhiguo from room service.  Zhiguo ate so much we had to take the plate away.  He had already had rice cookies & cheerios and his tummy was literally bulging!  Then off to the bath.  He was so excited to get his clothes off & get into the tub.  Right before bathtime, Zhiguo did to pee on the potty for us – yay!  It is obvious he is used to playing in the tub.  He took his favorite toy, the stacking cups, in with him and poured and splashed & even dumped water on his head.  He was too busy for me to wash him & kept trying to wiggle away from me so he could play more.  We dried him off, lotioned him up, and discovered that his new jammies fit perfectly.  Daddy gave Zhiguo his bottle, we cuddled a bit, and then it was bedtime.  We put Zhiguo in his bed around 7:45, he was asleep by 8:00, and he is still asleep now at 7am.  And yes, this is definitely Margaret’s little brother, because Zhiguo sucks his thumb!

In all, things are going perfectly, Praise the Lord!!!! Zhiguo has been very well cared for & is in excellent health.  He has a few scrapes on his face from a playground accident involving a tree & his is missing his fingernail on his middle finger.  He has some itchy eczema that causes him to scratch in his sleep, and that is the worst of it. 

  We cannot wait to bring Zhiguo home and introduce him to his brother & sister.  Mom says that Jack couldn’t stop smiling when he saw the pictures & Margaret smiled around her thumb in her mouth.  I miss them so much!!!!  We will be home soon, guys, with a new brother for you!!!!

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